Once upon a time....

You always want what you don't have, and don't want what you can easily have. But then again, chasing the challenging goals is so much more fun, isn't it?

W-O-W.. and that's all I have to say
FOR NOW.

Summer Classes for Men at
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTRE

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
by Friday, August 27th 2008
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM..

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics..
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

You know the funniest thing that I have been spreading in my household? I have been talking and thinking in the same vernacular style as the characters of religious TV soaps like Ramayana and Mahabharat. Yesterday when my dad was a little upset, I told him in a coy, obedient voice, "Kshama kare pitashri, kintu itna uttejit hona hamari parampara ke virrudh hai| Mujhe khed hai ki main aapki vyakulta ka karan bani huyi hoon, parantu aap mujhe apni bhool samajhane ka ek avsar to dete ", and all his anger melts away as everyone bursts out laughing. It is downright hilarious to have everyone at home talking this way. Good thing our neighbors don't understand a word of what we say, otherwise they'd think we're either insane or ancient :P

I take forever to update my blog, don't I? Well, what can I do - there are just so many things I can learn and do at work as a newcomer that I never have time or the isolation to blog, and once I am home, I do not feel like even touching my computer again. On the flip side, I have been reading books, watching religious epics, spending more time with family, trying to become healthier and figure out what I want from this life (and yet I hated philosophy in college, GO FIGURE).. Hence, my apologies to all my blog friends who stop by frequently and are not entertained by the exact same content that they saw ten days ago. I am going to have to use the same old cliched excuse of not having time to blog, but if you'd prefer, leave me a comment (if you haven't already) and I will be sure to inform you as soon as my next post is up!